Getting Things Done

This week has been a little bit lonelier than normal since Will has been visiting my parents, but I've gotten a lot done. Here's some of what I've accomplished:

• put away all of the kids winter 2009 clothes
• put away and reorganized spring/summer clothes
• scrapbooked
• cleaned off the dining room table (I haven't seen it through the clothes since Fall)
• completely emptied and scrubbed the fridge (yes, every shelf and drawer was removed)
• filled the kids' pool and watertable for fun splashing
• scrapbooked
• cooked my favorite meal with fresh Thai basil harvested from my garden
• cooked all the other meals of the week, but they weren't as memorable
• scrapbooked
• took the triplets with me to get the dog from the vet (they insisted on staying, but I brought them home with me)
• took the trio grocery shopping
• dumped more mulch and weeded the garden
• went "swimming" in the bathtub with the kids
• scrapbooked
• thoroughly cleaned a couple bathrooms
• mopped my bathroom (because the trio emptied a bottle of handsoap on the floor)
• reorganized a few of the toy bins

Those are a few anyway. Today may be the exception, but the week has given me day after day of the kids napping easily and for a decent amount of time, so I've managed to get a lot done on my scrapbooks.

Two nights ago, Allen and I were catching up on some recorded TV shows after Ben, Maddie, and Jon were in bed. About an hour after kissing them goodnight, I looked up from the TV and there was a miniature policeman in our living room. It seems Jon may have gotten some of the traits that Allen (and Will) had -- getting out of bed after bedtime to play. I had to shoo him back to bed four times that night and every single time he had that silly helmet on his head. Last night, I startled him when he escaped from his room, and he never got up again after that.

Yesterday morning, I was working on laundry and Jon and Maddie disappeared. I finally found them -- they had gotten into my room, climbed into my bed, gotten under the covers, and had used the remote to turn the TV on and change the channels. Yes, they've learned which buttons to push. . . they were perfectly happy laying in bed watching CNN news and weather.

We had a big storm roll through last night. Just about the time I was heading to bed, the thunder and lightening were so much that Ben started crying. (This is the first time a storm has bothered them.) When I went to check on him, Jon and Maddie were standing up and pretty nervous, too. I carried the three of them to the living room because the storm sounded worse in their room. Allen and I cuddled them while we watched out the window at the awesome light show and at Alton Brown explaining how to make the perfect icecream. After the weather calmed down, they went back to sleep in their beds, and I tried to sleep as much and as quickly as possible because I had a feeling it would be a rough night. Sure enough, the thunder rolled all night, but it was the weather alert radio that kept waking me up. The kids woke me up around 8:15, but since it was still stormy, it was too dark to fully wake up. We've sort of grumbled through the morning -- the coffee not quite kicking me into gear like I needed it to. I had planned on taking the kids to the library for reading time, but we didn't get that far. The only thing I've accomplished today is brushing my teeth, and getting breakfast and lunch on and off the table. . . .oh, and cleaning the bathroom after the kids poured soap on the floor. It turned out to be a bit of a good thing because they got their blankets soapy in the process, so I was able to get those loaded into the wash without any tears. Luckily, they were clean and dry in time for nap, but the kids kept telling me they were too hot (they were still warm from the dryer.)

As soon as the chattering stops and I know the kids are all snoozing, I'm going to shower and see if that makes me feel any better. Tonight, I am going out with my mothers of multiples group and I'm looking foward to our girls night. I hope to finish up another scrapbook page before bedtime, but we'll see if that pans out.

I am missing Will a lot now. Last Sunday, I was out for the day and when I got home, Ben, Maddie, and Jon asked why I didn't have Will with me. I guess they thought I had gone to get him. Today I asked them if they were ready to have Will home and they all said, "YES!" I asked them if they knew where he was, and Jon was the only one to answer: "Will went bye-bye to Gramma and Granddad." I was a little surprised that he knew all of it, but I think they'll be excited to see him. Allen and I have talked with Will each day, and sometime in there each of the little kids has talked to him, too. In case you wonder why I call it "Camp Granddad & Gramma," let me tell you some of what he's done: gone swimming in the lake, gone canoeing, gone fishing, fed the squirrel peanuts, caught fireflies, made smores and cooked hotdogs on the fire, scraped his leg, and sung his heart out. Sounds like camp to me . . .

One May Cough Turns Into Four June Bugs

May ended with a sick little boy, and the first week of June had all four kids sick. I had the perfect plans for the week, but only got to pull off a smooth Monday. Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday was spent with way too much Sesame Street, Wiggles, and Little Einsteins as I was filling each day with as many as ten breathing treatments, dosing antibiotics, and going through two boxes of kleenex. In between, I was cuddling and calming all four kids or trying to get them to relax enough to quit coughing and get some rest. I got a bit more of the laundry-monster tamed, and am slowly, but surely, regaining contol of it. We read a lot of books this week, and I am thrilled that Will can help me by reading to the little ones.

Thursday evening we went to Waco for the weekend to visit my parents and drop Will off for a week of "Camp Grandparents." On the way, we had to find a gas station with an easy-to-reach outlet so we could give Maddie a breathing treatment. Although we had some cranky-kid moments over the weekend, they all seemed to feel great Sunday morning and that was our first day of the last ten that we didn't need the nebulizer. The weekend was pretty laid-back. The kids got to pick flowers, play in the water, and catch bugs. Allen and I shopped for a camera case and got to go on a kid-free date. We had a tasty dinner, strong margaritas, then spent a few hours at Barnes & Noble with coffee and books. We took the kids swimming in the lake . . . well, the boys swam while Maddie sat on the shore admiring her pretty pink sun hat, her ruffled swimsuit, and her painted toes. She called her suit the "princess fish" suit because it had ruffles and fish on it. Each time we invited her to join us in the water, she turned up her nose and said, "No swim in dirty water!" She insisted that the water was dirty and even complained to me when she got splashed that she had "dirty WET" on her arm. At least the boys enjoyed it. It will be interesting to see what they think of the ocean when we visit it later this month.

Saturday, the kids donned life vests and got to ride in the canoe. All four love the canoe and like to drag their fingers through the water. After that, we got everyone cleaned up and visited the zoo. We came home from the zoo exhausted and I think everyone napped for a long time. Allen and I came home Saturday night with the triplets. The drive seemed particularly long to me since the kids were picking on each other, fussing, crying, and doing eveything possible to frustrate everyone in the car. Sunday was an fun day for me. I let Allen sleep in a bit, then I got to go to a friend's house to scrap with my buddies for most of the day. I put a big dent in my scrappy to-do list, and I had great company. I came home refreshed and excited to scrap some more.

Last night I talked to Will on the phone and, in the same sentence, he bragged that he caught five fish, but he doesn't like swimming anymore because he sinks. He hurried through our "good-night, I love you's" because he was ready to go catch fireflies. This morning the three little kids woke up in good moods, their appetites have returned, and they played hard all morning. Now they are all napping while I catch up.

Finishing up the month

May flew by me. Time is going quickly now, and since the kids don't nap as regularly as they used to, I am finding it harder and harder to get the little things done -- like updating the blog. This is the last time I am going to give excuses; updates will be hit-and-miss throughout the summer since I'll be home with all four kids almost all the time. Maybe when school starts, we'll have more of a regular routine. . . regular in that Mama gets a little "me-time" each day, and that will give me some time to post.

Since the last update. . .

I had a day out with Ben. When I asked him what he wanted to do, he told me he wanted to see "tiger-lions", so we went to the zoo.

Allen and I took the kids to the Texas Parks & Wildlife fishery. We all had a blast that day and got much more than we expected from the outing. There was a great museum, but our favorite part was the walking trail that went through the wetlands. The trail was paved, so easy to travel with the kids, and we saw lots of surprises along the way: a snake, a lizard, a turtle, several worms and bugs to stop and observe. And those were the things that weren't part of the "trail."On Memorial Day, we got the splash pool out for the kids wince it was warm. We hadn't counted on it cooling off so much, but by then the kids were excited and there was no turning back. So we let them "swim" and they turned blue, but at least they had a great time doing it. We've gotten it out a few more times since then, and now in the afternoons, if Allen goes outside at all, the little ones ask "Swimming night?". . . not to be confused with the fact that almost every day, Ben wakes up in the morning asking, "It 'zert night?" (translation: It is a dessert night?)Will graduated from preschool with an official ceremony. When Will walked in with his class, Jon and Ben were standing on the seats yelling, "Hi, Will! Hi, Will!" I think Will did his best to ignore the commotion, but as soon as the class was standing front and center facing the audience, Will shouted back "Hi!" with a bit of a smirk as if to explain that was the only way to get the little ones to be quiet. Allen and I stifled our snickering.

Will and I had our last day alone, and we went letterboxing -- his choice. We went to Camp Ford, a Civil War POW camp, and kindled a new curiosity in Will about U.S. history. Next we attempted to find two more treasures near each other, but we were greeted by some large, loud dogs before we got out of the car, so we kept driving. We tried to get another near a historic train depot, but ran into some fellas that worried this Mama, so we hopped back in the car. By that point Will told me, "This started as the best day in my life, but now it's the worst. Why can't we find some more boxes?" I tried explianing without over-worrying him that I just wasn't comfortable stopping in the middle of nowhere with scary-looking strangers or big, mad dogs coming at us, but he didn't understand. We met Allen for a quick lunch, and then the three of us set out to find more letterboxes. We went back to the depot, but there wasn't one there after all (we later found out, it's been missing for a few days, but will be replaced soon.) We also found a few more at some old cemeteries. After we dropped Allen off, Will decided that the ones we found was enough and he suggested we go to a library just to read. What a great way to end our date -- in fact, we found a children's book about World War II that he really enjoyed, especially since it had a few things in it that he learned at the aviation museum on our last day together. We have really enjoyed letterboxing since Allen and I tried it last August. It is a hobby that we thought would be fun for the kids, taking us to new places, teaching history and art, and we've been right. Will is asking a lot about WWII and the Civil War now because the letterboxes and clues whet his appetite.

Ben got a fever that lasted several days and was accompanied by a nasty cough. After the fourth day with no signs of relief, I took him to the doctor, and he has bronchitis again. We are trying a different antibiotic, but still needing to do breathing treatments, too. In the meantime, Jon has started wheezing again. When it gets uncomfortable for him, he comes to me and asks for "bweet tweet." Since I wasn't understanding his demands, he finally took my hand and guided me to the counter and pointed to the "breathing treatment." So as of today, Ben's still sick, Jon's on his way, and now Will has something similar. Maddie has needed lots of kleenex, but she isn't coughing yet. I hope the whole summer isn't like this -- it seems we've had some germ or another since the beginning of the year.Another new development has us chuckling. . . the little ones are getting to be very good at recognizing and identifying letters. Here is a recurring conversation with Jon about "W."

Mama: Jon, what is this letter? (showing him the "W" magnet)
Jon: Double! (quite proud)
Mama: It's double-you.
Jon: Double-ME!!! (even prouder since he thinks he's right)

Check out the photo Allen got of the kids. This is after a full afternoon of fighting nap-time, and I finally let them get up. Just as Allen got home from work, we found Jon and Maddie crashed on the living room floor.

Dear Sarah

My Dearest Sarah,

You are going to have a great Sunday! Although Allen is working, your morning will be full of joy. When you wake to a cool breeze and birds singing, you will feel rested. You will have time to shower and climb back into bed to cuddle with Will long before the triplets wake up. When you go upstairs to greet the babies, Jon will smile and run into your arms with a cheerful "Good morning, MAMA!" and a sweet kiss and hug. Maddie and Ben will be just as cheerful and all three will have perfect manners through breakfast. The kids will all enjoy breakfast and will chatter happily amongst themselves while you savor your two cups of coffee. The toddler tunes station will keep all of you happy and dancing together all morning. When the kids get tired of dancing, they will color and play with stickers. They won't even argue about sharing the crayons. While they are busy crafting, you will have a few minutes to just sit in your favorite chair with a new novel. You'll be able to really get into the story but still oversee your crafting kiddos. The morning will be cool enough that having the windows open will bring a refreshing breeze through the house. Each of the children will come sit in your lap and talk to you and listen to you tell them how much you love them. After the kids get tired of coloring, Ben and Will will go upstairs to play quietly, and they won't cause you any trouble at all. Over the baby monitor, you will hear Will and Ben playing restaurant until Will reads stories to Ben. Meanwhile, Jon and Maddie will be playing with cars and farm animals -- sometimes together, sometimes alone. It doesn't matter, all will be peaceful and loving in your home. You will look around and wonder why today seems so very different than most others. You will wonder why it is so, and the only answer is Me. Don't forget that as you finish your second cup of coffee and your second novel in the last 24 hours. Your children are happy. You are overflowing with joy, you needed the break. I understand the last month has been trying -- I've been with you every step of the way. I've tested your patience, grace, and stamina, and you've grown through these exercises. This morning is my gift to you and your family. You need to have your cup filled this morning, because your kids have quite an adventure planned for your afternoon. You won't realize it until it's too late to change it, but Maddie kept a very special purple crayon close, but you never would think to check in her diaper, would you? Maddie and Jon will be creative with that damp
crayon at naptime. You can handle it. Don't lose your cool. You are always on my mind, and I am always watching over you. I can't wait to see how this turns out. . .oh, yeah, I already know. I love you, Sarah.

Love,

God

Getting Caught Up

I don't know how more than a week goes by before I get a chance to blog. It's the stage of our life where getting away from the kids is getting more challenging. Not necessarily in a bad way (ok, some days I DO need to get away), but the triplets are no longer confined by baby gates. They just open them when they want out. And doors? Only locking it keeps them out, so now I lock the door when I potty or I have a circus in there while I'm taking care of business. . . or sitting on the floor with a book trying to hear myself think. Here is what happened while I started blogging and the kids were awake today -- Maddie and Ben dumped the pet water all over themselves, then got lots of towels and new diapers to spread the lake around the kitchen and hallway. Last weekend was such a long, long time ago. . . . Thursday afternoon, the UPS guy brought almost 50 plants that I had mail ordered for the garden. I started trying to get them in the garden while the kids played, but I only got 3 in before I was on my way to looney trying to do too much. The kids just wanted my attention, and I just wanted to dig. I was getting stressed trying to figure out how to get the plants in the ground so that they lived and how to keep the kids entertained and loved so that the crying would stop. Allen was still working nights, so I knew it would be awhile before I would have help with either. Then I had a brilliant idea! Friday morning Christina, our sitter, came over and played with the kids. They couldn't have been happier since she pushed them on the swings for about an hour and a half. Since Christina was also keeping her neices, Will had another 5-year old playmate. Everyone was playing happily while I got the plants in the garden.

Saturday, was a glorious day and our early Mom's Day celebration. My mom and mom-in-law came for a Mother's Day brunch with my mothers of multiples group. We got all prettied up for the event and even remembered to get a picture. The food was superb and the company awesome. Allen and Dad stayed with the kids. Allen was still working that weekend, so we all had an early barbeque dinner then our parents went home, Allen went to work, and I came home with the kiddos. Mother's day was mostly just another day. The kids and Allen wished me a happy day. My gift was a pendant I had designed with the kids on it. Allen took the kids to the grocery store while I stayed home for some quiet, then he cooked me an awesome steak dinner with my favorite veggie -- asparagus. It's was sort of depressing that it took him such a long time to prepare the meal then he had to leave for work before eating dinner with us. Although it was delicious, I think next time I'll choose PB&J if it means he gets to eat with us.

Monday: I don't remember it, but I did get some pictures of the non-napping afternoon. When I checked on the commotion (several times) this was the scene. When I demanded the kids get the mess of clothes picked up, they were kind enough to pile the wet diapers by the door. I put diapers on them, sprayed them with lots of sunscreen, then sent the outside for the rest of the afternoon. They enjoyed it, but they turned into Mr. Sandman (and Miss) because they played in the sandbox while the sunscreen was still sticky. Just before dinner, we took diapers off and played the family favorite: chase the naked kids around the yard with a hose to get them desanded. . . seriously, they like it. They taunt me with "Git me, Mama!" "I want shower . . .NOOOOOO!" as they come as close as they dare then streak across the yard. I struggle to run, dragging 50 feet of hose and dodging dog-dookey. They laugh and laugh and laugh until it's really time to get clean and go inside.

Tuesday, after I dropped Will off at preschool, the little kids and I went to a garden center just outside of town. We wandered around there for about an hour -- wowwie!! a full hour of peaceful shopping WITH three toddlers -- thank goodness for the flat bed cart that the kids loved to ride, and the many, many blooms that smelled so sweet. We came home with a few more plants to add to the herb garden since some of my seedlings didn't make it. Now I have 158 plants in our garden, and I think I'm done for now. . . I guess I'm really enjoying getting my hands dirty.

Wednesday was my day out with Will, and he decided he wanted to go to the aviation history museum. I had remembered seeing clues to a letterbox out near where the museum is, so I had printed the clues so we could search for it. It was a pretty easy treasure for us to find and Will was thrilled to add the stamp to our book. We timed the first part of day so that we finished with the letterbox just as the museum was opening. I didn't have high expectations for the museum since we are in a fairly small town, but I was in for a pleasant surprise. As we arrived we were greeted by several docents who were excited to show us the exhibit of aviation items and memorabilia. A very kind air-force retiree gave us the tour. Although he struggled, at times, to simplify all his knowledge so that a five year old might understand, he kept our attention and patiently answered Will's many, many questions. Later that day, Will was playing with the triplets in the backyard. Tossing small toys from the top of his playhouse, he was shouting, "Watch out . . . B .. E.. L.. O.. W!!" as he explained to the kids that he was "dropping bongs on the bad-guy, Jip-pennies." He understood parts of it, anyway. We met Allen for lunch and Will told him all about the pointy stick (pitot tube) on the nose of the plane and that it tells how fast the plane is going. Overall, it was a fun and educational day that Will was excited about.That evening, Allen was working pretty late, so we ate out at a new seafood restaurant. I mention this only because the dinner conversation kept us giggling. I gave Jon, Maddie, and Ben a taste of catfish and they decided it was quite tasty, but the name was a bit confusing for them. Ben asked me for more "chicken" and I explained it was "catfish." He nodded and gave me the sideways eyes that make me wonder if he already knows how crazy I am. The Jon piped up that he wanted "more cat, please, Mama." Excuse me? "I want more cat, please." as he pushed his plate toward mine. "Jon, we don't eat 'cat,' this is catFISH." He looked at me with a smile as I gave him some more. Then Maddie had to have more, but she insisted on calling it "cat FOOD." This happened several times as they cleaned my plate for me, but eventually we just rolled with their new words. Why do we keep trying to rationalize with two-year olds? It just doesn't work.

Thursday was Maddie's day, and since she hadn't been to the zoo without siblings, I thought that would be fun. She seemed to enjoy it, but she held back. When she wasn't in the stroller, she was stuck to my shoulder. Near the end of our adventure, she did finally step away from me to look around. In this picture she is excited to see the "addigator" floating in the water. I think that was her favorite find of the day.

And here were are back to today. I cleaned the playroom up and helped the kids set up a restaurant with table and chairs, a blanket-tablecloth, play food, and a cook station. They happily shared waitstaff and chef duties as they passed around the menus and apron. Maddie, as the chef, was so nice to pepper Jon's waffle and he politely thanked her. It was cute to watch them serving each other, preparing the food, and the whole time, using the best manners. Eventually they tired of that game and played other versions, but I was surprised they played so nicely for over an hour.And here's a few smiles to start your weekend right. This is what happens when Will and Ben sit in my lap while I'm playing with the camera. I couldn't help but turn the lens our way and catch a few grins.

Just a {little} sample

Today, Allen stayed home with Will and Jon who were napping while I went to pick up Ben and Maddie. Just before Allen left for work, I asked him to wake Will up while I read Brown Bear to Maddie and Ben. Before I finished the story, Allen was screaming at the top of his lungs for me to get up there quickly.

Backing up the story just a bit . . . About two weeks ago, Will brought home the info sheet and permission slip to go on a class trip to an inflatable gym. I usually get the slips back the next school day, but with this one, I stalled. . . as long as I could. First of all, it was the first one I wouldn't be going with him, and secondly, it was the first time I had to sign a slip saying blah-blah-blah we wouldn't hold the facility or the preschool liable if he died or became paralyzed yada-yada-yada. Seriously? My kid was supposed to go on a trip to a place that had to have a disclaimer that he'd be lucky to make it out alive. . . they didn't even make me sign that when they sent all these kids home from the hospital with me.

Today, I dropped off Will and his carseat and hesitantly-signed permission slip, dropped off Maddie and Ben at Mothers day out, then took Jon for some bloodwork (not to worry -- it was a routine check they did at his well-kid check-up, but his blood clotted in the sample so they needed to do it over.) Jon and I ran some errands then went home to get Allen to figure out the rest of the day. When we got home, Allen said Will's teacher just called. Evidently, Will tripped on a basketball, fell, and smacked his head on the concrete floor. He cried but calmed down and played with the other kids for about 30 minutes then sat down and didn't move. . . not even when it was lunch time. Will rarely passes up fun, friends, or food, so his teacher called us. We changed our plans a bit and went to get him. After lunch, Allen stayed with Jon and Will, and I went to get the other two. Flash forward. . .

When I heard Allen yell for me, I was terrified that he hadn't been able to wake Will. I raced up the stairs leaving flames where my feet flew. I rounded the staircase and whizzed through the playroom and was a bit confused that Allen was changing Jon's diaper instead of calling 911. Then Will walked out and I realized he was okay. So why was Allen screaming? Jon had eaten a tube of Desitin diaper ointment . . . and emptied TWO sealed bags of wipes, thereby beating all previous records for the number of wipes scattered about the room. My first reaction? How did he get those bags open that I can never open myself? My second one? $#%&@ I'm sick of this mess! My third (or so) reaction? At least the kid who ate the cream is the one we can make puke easily. Allen, as calm and sensible as he is, reminded me that the tube said call poison control, not induce vomiting. So, amidst the cries of Maddie and Ben (since I had abruptly quit reading Brown Bear at the green frog), I plugged one ear and listened to the sweet lady at the Texas Poison control center explain that Desitin "is not actually a very toxic substance" so that part would be okay. She did warn me that the more he ate, the worse the mess will be when it comes out the other end. My thought: someone should invent an edible diaper cream that applies itself at the end.

Allen was a little bit flustered that Jon pulled one over on him. I explained to Allen that was just a little sample of what the last week and a half has been like, and that usually there are three kids in that room wreaking havoc. What he experienced was tooth-picked horse-doovers compared to the normal five-course feasts I've gotten to enjoy this week. I think he laughed, but I've conveniently blocked out the rest that would've made me jealous that he gets to go away to work.

In the last THREE days, I have picked up four emptied packages of wipes, a big bag of dumped diapers three times, two destroyed rolls of duct tape, and a crate of off-season clothes. Additionally, I have laundered toddler sheets, blankets, and pillows every day because they are stripping themselves and peeing everywhere. When I duct tape the diapers, Ben and Jon are so proud to have figured out how to peel the tape away to escape. Twice I have had to lay out all the components of my glider chair to dry because the toddlers would get a "sip" of water then go spit it on the chair . . . soaking it before I even realized what they were doing. In the meantime, I've had nine drawers emptied continuously, and one of those times, a dresser actually crashed to the floor. Yes, we need to attach it to the wall -- it was the one we push in front of the closet so they don't get into it also. This morning, Jon disappeared for a bit too long, and I found him in the upstairs bathroom with a tube of red toothpaste and Will's toothbrush. He had gotten to the tape and had wrapped it around himself twice, but didn't get the end cut. The dispenser was behind him stretching a few feet of clear tape. Wherever he walked, the tape picked up items. When I found him he looked like a slug with a slime trail that at caught a comb, a few toys, and plenty of pet hair.

Yesterday, I decided we weren't having quite enough chaos, so I got out paints, paper, pans, and marbles for the kids get creative. I was crazy enough to take pictures while doing my best to keep the kids from redecorating the kitchen and living room. I'm glad I was snapping shots, because there are a few that perfectly capture Ben's personality. I'll just let the pictures tell the story. . .

Here's Will:

Now, Jon:

Maddie:And, dear, sweet, mess-loving, grubby-fingered, blue-lipped, purple-tongued, green-haired Ben:

The end results were several beautiful (to a mama) one-of-a-kind creations we sent to their great- and great-great-grandmas for mother's day.

There was one important lesson I learned in this activity: when I sent four kids with painted fingers to the kitchen sink to wash hands, it only took 10 seconds to get them there, but they've some how managed to rush through a dining area, living room, bathroom, two hallways, and the kitchen in that flash of time. Lucky for me, all the handprints washed off the walls and floors, but I think I'll just carry a bucket of water to the craft table to clean hands next time. . . .And why can't they move that fast when I say it's bedtime???

Running on E

Last weekend, Allen parents kept the kids so I could go to Kansas as originally planned (a big thank you!). Since Allen was still working weekends, I thought I'd have to cancel my trip. Thankfully, I was able to go, and I enjoyed the quiet ride up there. I loved getting to visit all my friends from Chasing Rainbows while I scrapped just a little bit. It was easier to not be so lonely since I was busy and with buddies, but I still missed Allen. I'm definitely a mommy. . . after being worn out by the little people over the last few weeks, I was so excited to be getting away; but then I just kept looking at their photos, and I couldn't wait to get back to them. I put over 900 miles on my vehicle this weekend in just over 48 hours. Whew!

I got up early Sunday to try to get the kids and make it all the way home before Allen had to be at work. I hadn't seen him and I was so anxious for me to get a hug . . . and they missed Daddy, too. After I picked the kids up from Allen's parents, I still had 2 1/2 hours to drive and I knew I needed to get gas at some point. You see, my car's fuel guage stinks -- it doesn't work after it hits 1/4 of a tank. It could be at 1/4 tank and five miles later the dummy-light is on. As the kids nodded off to the land of dreamy afternoon naps, the needle approached the 1/4 tank abyss, and it was then that my metaphor for my life started to take shape.

As I drove I watched the needle edge closer to the E, but I wanted to just keep driving because the kids were all sleeping peacefully. . . I knew if I stopped the car they'd wake up and fill the car with two hours of deafening wailing with no chance of hearing a firetruck passing. I kept on driving, savoring the silence. . . curious about how far I could push it . . . and wondering who would come help me if I was stranded in the middle of nowhere with four small kids and no gas. That is pretty much how my life is lately . . . I am forcing myself as far as I can, enjoying the quiet when I can, knowing I'm approaching EMPTY quickly, but not knowing exactly when that will be. Many times recently, I feel like I AM stranded on a highway watching everyone rush past the kids and me since I'm too difficult to climb out of the car to wave down help -- especially when it's my dumb fault I ran out of gas. My time-outs are usually wasted at the computer or television, because they don't expect or demand anything from me. My fingers may itch to scrapbook or I may want to read a book, but I hate to start something when I don't want the peace to be broken -- I get quite frustrated when I'm interrupted, and usually those are things Allen let me do uninterrupted (when he's home.) I need to refuel, but I want to avoid the wailing. Maybe tonight I'll get my scrap stuff out again. . . or start a book . . . but first I need to grab a bite to eat.

It's been too long since we've seen Allen at the "normal" hours. The last few days, I sleep restlessly until he gets home and climbs into bed at 5 am. He sleeps until lunchtime, plays with the kids, then heads back to work a little after 3. When the kids got up from naps today, they kept calling for Daddy, but I miss him even more than they do -- the adult conversation, the hugs and kisses, an extra set of hands at bedtime, my teammate, friend, and partner. We have managed to squeeze in two romantic kid-free dinner dates on Mondays since we haven't been dancing but the sitter still came. As tough as life can be with Daddy on a different schedule, I know -- I KNOW -- we are so blessed. Each night we pray for his safety and health and thank God that he has a job that supports us all.

Allen -- Thanks for your hard work, Babe! We all miss you and love you and can't wait to see you when you wake up!