Monkey see, Monkey do

Yesterday, as I was thinking about dinner, I watched the kids playing in the yard. Maddie was running and tripped, falling right into the mud. Her hands were suddenly in dark brown gooey gloves, and her face and hair had been splattered with the muck. She did NOT like that and set out to screaming about the injustice as the boys ignored her and ran off to the play-set. I brought her inside, peeled off and stain-treated her clothes, then set about to wiping the grime from her tear-stained cheeks. With her bottom on the side of the sink, we soaked her fingers and toes in the warm water as I used the lavender-scented soap to make her feel pretty again. . . . then daddy came in, her face was instantly brightened as she bragged about her muddy adventure. As Allen went to change clothes, I looked up to check on the three boys and was horrified by what I saw.

I screamed for Allen to come quick because I didn't want to be the one dealing with the atrocity I laid my eyes upon. . . and anyway, I was still playing with lavender bubbles and my little girl. When he got around to hearing my distressed calls, he came running, saw what I saw, and he had the NERVE to chuckle. I asked him (calmly) if he would please deal with the three bare butts facing me as the boys (um...) "watered" the tree at the back of the yard.

Allen finished changing while Maddie helped me unload the dishwasher. By the time he was ready to go out to check on the boys, Jon and Ben were gleefully sliding bare-butt down the slide, giggling, then scrambling up to do it again. Will had disappeared. As it turned out, Will taught his younger brothers how to take aim at the tree, but then he squatted to finish his business. When we asked him why, he said because Mama locked the door so we couldn't go in to do it. The biggest problem was discovered later when he told us he needed new undies because we don't keep Charmin next to the tree.

Other than that, the last week has been all about preparing for our families to visit this past weekend to celebrate Ben's, Maddie's, and Jon's third birthday. I made banana monkey cupcakes with chocolate icing and the kids liked them a lot. We had a fabulous time with our families, and the kids have napped well ever since. I wonder how many days until they are back to "normal?" Here are some of the pictures of the kids from the weekend:

Cold and colds

Right now I am using Allen's laptop at the kitchen table. The kids are surrounding me with giggles, squeals, and a bit of whining as they color. Ice Age is on the TV, but since no one is watching it, I really should turn it off. We are aiming to have a calm (aka: lazy) Sunday morning inside while it is cold and misty outside. We are not going to church this morning as planned because Will is on the second day of a 102-degree fever. He was up at least half a dozen times last night because he was cold, or hot, or coughing, or nauseous, or thirsty, or tired, or uncomfortable, or lonely. . . so that means I need more coffee to get through the day because I was up as many times, too.



This past week I feel like I've accomplished a lot. Yesterday (another "lazy" day with a sick kiddo) I even cozied up on the couch with a blanket and just read a book. I didn't even feel guilty because there wasn't much I HAD to be doing. The weather is cool enough that the house is a bit chilly, but mostly comfortable. I had fall scented candles melting while the turkey roasted and the aromas definitely shouted that it is fall . . . this weekend, anyway.



This week we decided on the color we'll paint Maddie's room, and the little boys' mural arrived. It is a jungle scene with many colors, and finding the "right" one to put on the walls has been a bit of a challenge. By the end of this week, the Sherwin-Williams employees won't even need to ask me my phone number to pull up our account. I've put three different colors up on the walls, and maybe (just maybe?) I put one on this morning that will be the winner. Sadly, it looks disgusting in the can, but on the walls it is quite nice -- warm, neutral, and calm.



Allen went to WalMart to stock me up on a few paint supplies -- somehow we seem to have left our paint roller and tray in Kansas, but we brought lots of brushes and roller pads with us. I plan to spend my Mother's Day Out this week painting one room or another, and hopefully we will have the little kids' rooms done before Thanksgiving. With the right circumstances, I think I can get most of the work done before Halloween, but hanging the 100-square-foot mural will be the challenging part since I'll need adult help with it and another for the kids.



Next weekend the triplets are turning three, so this week I went on a grand adventure -- to the Party Store for decorations. And to make it even more exciting, I was crazy enough to take the three birthday kids. I am glad to say I survived it, but there were times I was wondering if they would. Somehow we left only with the things I intended to buy, but there were a few tantrums because we didn't need 8 dozen cups in four different shades of pink and two shades of purple. Maddie settled on a pink party hat and one package of purple cups. Another fit happened because I suggested Jon pick a different party hat other than the silver sequined cowgirl(?) hat with the white maribou trim. He settled for the green polka-dotted one. And yes, Ben had his fit, too -- I insisted we get blue plates and he didn't think we needed any. Every time I put them in the basket and turned to move on, he'd put them back on the shelf. I can't say I had fun, but I intended to. Next year, I will either take more adults or fewer children, or maybe I'll plan ahead enough to just order the supplies online. The last few days I've been strolling through miles of photos we've taken of the kids over the last three years. Ben, Maddie, and Jon are going to be three next weekend and with all the family coming for our party, I hope to create a slide show to see how far they've come since they entered this world. It's been hard for me to look at the NICU photos because no parent likes to see their newborn full of tubes and IVs, but its been nice to see the changes that we don't notice because they are with us every day. It's been nice to see the circumstances we've overcome, lived through, and learned to enjoy. Until I get more photos uploaded, I leave you with some recent ones of the kids.
This is Ben sleeping in the car. He woke up long enough to get out of his car seat, but fell back to sleep on the way to the door. He didn't come out when the other there came tumbling out, and when I looked for him, I found him asleep again -- on the floor of the van with his head on the seat. He has always slept in some strange positions, and here is another one for the books. Here is Will's toothless grin.
And this was snapped just before Ben, Maddie, and Jon went for school pictures. They each chose their own outfits, and Maddie insisted on pigtails. Since what they pick is so much about who they are at the moment, I let go of the fact that the photos might not match on the wall (yes, I'm a bit silly about things like that.) In the end, the proofs turned out adorable and the teachers even posed them together for a picture. I can't wait to get the pictures back to share!

And finally, Maddie got the prize last week for my favorite quote: ". . .and Mama, don't call me pumpkin! You can call me Princess."

Fall cleaning and other details

Now that autumn is here, I am excited. Maybe its because I get fresh air blowing through the windows all day or that I'm getting ready to be inside a lot more with the cooler weather, but I have been busy as a bee nesting. While many people talk about spring cleaning, for me, NOW is the time for decluttering and deep-cleansing. This poor blog has been neglected. As you can imagine, life with a kindergartener and three (almost three-year old) toddlers is busy. Here is the quick version of what's been going on lately.


Since the girl-friend talk Will has had over two weeks of (almost) excellent behavior at school. We aren't sure if it was the girl, or the bribe that he could buy his lunch after several good days, or the fact that he missed his favorite classes the last time he was in suspension, but its all good now and we are all happier because of it.

Two weeks ago, I had a delightful day with Ben. We went to the wildlife museum and then to Einstein Bros. for lunch. He napped in the afternoon, so it was perfect!

We experimented and had a family camp-IN. We had grilled hotdogs and smores for dinner, the kids went skinny-dipping in the pond (bathtub), and we hot chocolate just before bed. The kids started out sleeping in the tent that was pitched in our living room and we even left all the lights out the entire evening, using only the flashlights and campfire (candle). It was fun for awhile, but eventually most of them were sent to sleep in their real beds because they wouldn't quit jumping on siblings. Ben is the only one who fell asleep in the tent and he stayed there all night by himself.

Will lost his first tooth, but he double lost it. After he lost his tooth, it disappeared (probably down the toilet, as he tells it.) Luckily, the tooth fairly accepts letters as well as teeth, because she came that night and left him a dollar coin.

Ben, Maddie, and Jon love to sing. It brings me such joy to hear "Jesuth loveth me this I know. For 'da Bible tellth me tho. Little oneth to him are long. They're weak and he isth stwong! Yesth! Jesuth LOVES ME!!!" and the other favorites now are Eensy-Weensy Spider, ABCs, Row Your Boat, Mary has a little lamb, and Twinkle Little Star. I love to hear them sing, and it makes us giggle to hear them correcting each others' lyrics. Just last week, we were driving home from Bible study and Jon started belting out his version of an oldie. . . "Oh, oh, oooh, its MAGGOTS!! You knoooo-ooo-oow. . . " and all these years I've been mistakenly singing "Magic." Thanks for straightening that out for me, Son.

Last week, my MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) table took all our toddlers to the zoo. The weather was perfect and we all had a good time.

This weekend, Ben climbed up toy bins to get the little key and unlocked a room that we keep locked to keep the kids out. Ugh -- now to find a new place to hide the key since now that doesn't work either.

Two weeks ago, I was busy getting stuff ready for the local childrens clothing consignment sale. We cleared a bunch of space from the garage because we sold three highchairs, a Bumbo seat, the triple-stroller, and a double-stroller. I also prepped a lot of baby clothes and sold most of them. I got my check in the mail this weekend for $325 so it was worth the trouble. The money is going to be used to buy the paint and mural to do the little kids' rooms this fall.

Other projects we've completed this weekend: organizing ALL the kids' clothing and packing it to be used and not forgotten, unloading a ton of clothing and other stuff to GoodWill (finally), cleaning out the vegetables from the garden and laying down new mulch, cleaning and organizing the garage, cleaning up/organizing/getting rid of toys, reorganizing the linen closet and the kids closets. Now I have another bunch of boxes for GoodWill, but we are making progress and it feels great! The toys and kids' clothes were taking over our house and one of my new years' resolutions was to get a handle on them. I feel like I can mark it off the list (for this year) after working bit by bit over the last few months.

I still have a few projects I'd like to keep working toward. Our goal is to get the little kids' rooms done. We've picked our paint color for Maddie's room and already have the bedding. We've picked the mural for the boys' room and are waiting to get it to pick out the paint and bedspreads. We still need to find some beds for the guys, too, but that takes some effort and isn't imperative (yet). The little kids have been napping in three separate rooms so they won't play, so this bedroom project has moved to the front for now. I'd like to get a few mums for the garden and hopefully plant my bulbs. I'd like to get a few more picture frames on the wall and start thinking about how I'll decorate the playroom. My pantry needs to be cleaned out, and my craft space needs a few days of hard labor (and purging.) I have the energy now to work on it all, and I want to get as much done while I'm "in the mood."

He knows me well

Last night Will was having one of his all-out-need-to-sleep-now tantrums whileI was getting the little kids ready for bed. Jon was the last one up on the changing table and he studied my facial expressions as we were forced to listen to Will's tirades.

Jon looked at me and innocently asked, "Wha's wong, Mama?"
I calmly replied, "I'm frustrated by the noise."
Jon's eyes got really wide as he questioned me again, "Are you cwazy yet?"

Running for Office?

*** BEEP! BEEP *** Now that I have your attention . . . this is a story written by ALLEN!!

Will’s disciplinary plan at school uses a “Green-Yellow-Red” system for behavior. They start the day on Green and if they misbehave they get moved up the scale. On the day we had a parent-teacher-principal conference concerning his behavior, he got moved from Green to Yellow. He also didn’t get a “Token” – a special achievement the teacher said she’d begun using for Will and Nathaniel (another boy in Will’s class who’s [apparently] needed some emphasis on following rules).
Our practice at dinner has been to discuss with Will what he’s done during the day – what work he’s had, letters learned, books read, etc. and then move on to his behavior. The conversation moves along pleasantly that day, until we come to the behavior part.

Me – “How was your behavior today, Will? Did you get your token?”
Will – (reluctantly,) “I got on both Green and Yellow today.”
Which was it? Green or Yellow?
Both.
(realizing that this won’t go much further) And what about your token?
That’s a long story. We don't need to talk about it now.
I have time.
No. It’s a really long story. I don’t know if you want to hear it.
Son, I want to know why you didn’t get your token so I can help you understand how to make better choices.
OK. If you’re sure. The first part – do you know the story about the tortoise and the hare?
Yes, I know it.
About how slow and steady wins the race, but fast and not steady doesn’t come in first? But it seems like fast and steady could win, but that's another story.
Yes.
How the hare is fast and the turtle is steady and that’s why he doesn’t get behind?
Yes. Is this why you didn’t get your token?
No. OK. Part two – now the tortoise and the hare were having a race. And the tortoise went slow and steady and he won the race but the hare didn’t.
I see. Part three? What happened with your token?
OK part three. See Nathaniel and I were doing letters and he was going slow and writing too small and I was writing fast and scribbling and that’s why he didn’t get his token.
OK. Why didn’t you get your token? Is it because you were scribbling?
NO I said “me” not “he.” ME was going slow and steady.
So is that why you didn’t get your token? Were you not following directions?
OK part four – See he was writing too big on his paper and scribbling and that’s why he didn’t get his token. I was doing it and the teacher said that’s why I couldn’t have his token.
What’s Nathaniel’s writing have to do with your token?
Part five – he was writing fast and scribbling and I was doing it too small and that’s why.
So you were writing small? I thought he was writing small.
No. I said “he” not “me.” He didn’t get his token because he was writing small.
So you were scribbling?
No. I said “me” not “he.” Why are you getting so confused? Are you ready for part six? I'm on six, now, right?
Yes, Will. Why didn’t you get your token?
He didn’t get a token because Nathaniel wasn’t doing it right.
Doing what? Were you not following directions?
No, see, Daddy. In part seven I’ll explain it to you.

And that’s why he didn’t get his token that day. He never really changes the subject, but is already a master at deflecting juuuuust enough that he’s sliding out of it. I think he has a career in the Senate ahead of him. Lord help us all.

The first talk about girls

We've been diligently, but frustratingly, dealing with Will and discipline issues at school. The problem? In his words, "Just because they are the teachers doesn't mean I want to do what they say. I want to do what I want to do, not what they think I should be doing." He summarized all the problems, now we just have to keep at it so that eventually (hopefully sooner than later) he understands what we expect. He has been in in-school-suspension several times already in the three and a half weeks he has been in kindergarten, but yesterday they may have gotten his attention because he had to miss some of his favorite classes: PE and music.

Yesterday afternoon he sat in my lap and told me he had some questions. As we cuddled, he asked me how he could get a girl friend. I took a deep breath just to give myself a few seconds to think, then asked him if he knew what a girl friend was. Giving me the DUH-look, he explained to me, since I was too dumb to know, that it is a girl who is a friend who is more special than the other girls because [he] likes her more. Taking another contemplative breath, I added the gulp because he explained it too well for a five year old. Seriously? A girl friend? I didn't go into much detail for a few reasons: 1. I had to share this fun with Allen (much better than replaying it later,) 2. I wanted us to think through it before answering, and 3. I needed to get in the right mind-set (as in, don't giggle, he's serious). I realized that how we answered these somewhat simple questions and handled the subsequent discussion would have a huge impact on our approachability as Will got older and the questions got tougher. So, we talked for a little bit and I explained that I never had to worry about getting a girl friend, but Daddy was pretty good at it so we could all talk about it at dinner with the expert.

Dinner came way to fast, and the question came up again, but directed at Daddy. Since I had time to warn him about it, we had time to get our plan together and Allen explained that to get a girl friend, Will would need to be kind and respectful to her, her friends, her classmates, and her teacher. Nice touch, huh? The day before, Will was in in-school-suspension for spitting on another girl -- Not MY son, Will, the other one who lives with us sometimes. After we discussed the reasons that respect is so important, Will boasted that he already knew what the next step was. My mind was racing. . . "The next step to what, dear?" "To getting a girlfriend." Allen's eyebrows went up and he asked Will what the next step was. Will blushed. . . hid his face behind his hands. . . giggled. . . hid under the table. . . I forget what else. He somehow drew it into a ten-minute display of embarrassment and told us he couldn't tell us because we would laugh. When we showed him we were, in fact, serious, he continued the show so we said we could talk about it when he was ready and there was no pressure. When we tried to change the subject, he squeaked from under the table, "You can't laugh if I tell you." "Ok. We won't laugh." "Promise?" "Yes."

"I know the second step is a kiss!" he whispered as he turned a deeper shade of red, covered his face, and put his head under the table -- again. Ok. Deep breath. WHAT WOULD YOU DO??? If there is even a smirk on your face at this point in the story, there is no way I should feel guilty. . . but I couldn't help myself. . . the snicker escaped. I tried so HARD to stay serious, but he was UNDER the table!! He quickly sat up, pouted, and his eyes got puddles at the bottom as he glared at me and accused, "SEEEE?? I knew you would laugh at me. WAH!!!"

Allen saved me and we quickly explained that were weren't laughing at what he said, but the fact that he was hiding. It didn't take much to calm him down, he sat up and stated, "That's okay. I know I can trust you." Allen explained that the kiss came much later, and that was mostly the end of the conversation . . . until the kids were in bed and Allen and I could replay it. I felt horrible. I messed up. I know it. I just hope it is forgiven and doesn't cause bumps later.

When we tucked Will in that night and prayed with him like we do each night, he added an extra request to God. "God? Please, please help me get a girl friend. Amen."

Renewing Rains

The other day I wrote how the little kids and I were finding a comfortable routine. The same day I was thinking how peaceful it is at home even with three kids running around. Today, I threw all that out the window, put those kids out in the back yard and double-locked the door. I've calmed down since, but I was ready to box them up and mail them to their grandparents where I know there is always enough love to go around. By the end of the day, I was not feeling very loving toward the three youngest.

The day started as normal. . . the kids were fed, we waved goodbye to Daddy and Will, we came inside and got them dressed, just to get naked a few minutes later when they went outside to play. Remember: I'm okay with that -- that means I'm not spending hours getting mud stains out of clothes. So with the "please stay out of the muddy water" request, I set about to dealing with the loads of laundry that have been piling up while I've been getting consignable clothes cleaned. While I was changing a load, they (SURPRISE!) got muddy. By the time they are even a little bit muddy, it doesn't matter. They'll need a bath to get a little mud off, so why fight it? They played outside until lunchtime, I fed them at the picnic table, then I took them inside for a leisurely bath. We followed bath time with nap time. As I mentioned: the day started like any other day.

Then nap time came. Several times, I found three children in one bed. After a few scoldings and spankings, I went into their room and Ben had finally fallen asleep. Maddie and Jon, on the other hand, were back in the same bed, naked, and had rolled up their diapers and were seeing how far they could throw them. Scolding, spanking, start over. Not but a few minutes later, I heard the thud. . . thud . . . hehehe. . . .hehehehe again. Again, throwing the diapers at the door. Again, bare-butt spank. Again, diaper toss. Again, bare-butt spank. By then I was beyond angry, and Ben hadn't slept very long before he was awakened. Not a happy afternoon at that point.

As I finished up my tasks, those three little squirts who were supposedly playing in the adjacent playroom slipped past me and went downstairs. I heard a crash and went running to see what they were up to. Those three teamed up to get a snack, but managed to dump a nearly new can of Parmesan cheese on the dog's head. I am supposing at this point because there was a mountain of cheese on the floor and a big white cloud of it on the back of Shadow's neck. The rest was on the dog's tongue, on the kids' feet, or in the many, many little footprints all over the kitchen. I made Ben, Maddie, and Jon sit and watch me vacuum and clean all the other bottles of condiments that made it to the floor. And, of course, there was a full stick of frozen butter that had been gnawed on, but I promise the butter Ben chewed in July was thrown in the trash and this was a different one. Needless to say, I was pretty peeved when I loaded them in the car to go get Will from school, and when I returned, I was even more frustrated because I listened to Jon scream and squeal the entire 20 minutes we were gone. He actually needs a nap, whether he takes one or not.

I tried being a pleasant Mama. I spent some time going through Will's school folder letting him tell me about his projects from the day, and I found a paper about soccer. Suddenly remembering I wanted to call about karate, I rushed upstairs to google the phone number and am gone only a few moments. I came back downstairs to make the phone call, and as I'm descending, a strong smell hits me. . . hard. The weird thing was that it was a strangely fresh, clean scent. I walked a few steps and saw three sets of eyes peeking at me and heard a chorus of uh-oh's coming from the laundry room. As I approach, three pairs of legs scrambled to safety but ended up slipping and sliding through more than a gallon of bright orange "renewing rain" scented Tide liquid detergent. Um. Yeah. I cried and screamed for at least ten minutes, realized my neighbor wasn't home, so I called Allen for help. I had to leave him a message and I later found out he thought one of our pets died because of my desperate sobbing. For safety reasons, I put the three kids in the bath for the second cleaning of the day, but I didn't need soap this time since they were covered in it. I had to be careful not to get it in their eyes because they had already rubbed the orange goop into their hair. After that bath, they smelled like renewed rain, and still had a bit of a slick to their skin. Allen called as I was drying them off, I explained the situation, and he told me to put them out in the backyard and lock the door. Before you go thinking we are bad parents for doing that, please remember 1.) they get muddy and don't think anything of walking through an unlocked door to sit on the couch, 2.) I wouldn't be at the door to clean them up if I was cleaning the soap up, 3.) it had been a rough day. So from the tub to the porch they went -- nope, I didn't dry them first. Nope, I didn't dress them. Nope, not even a diaper -- Why? They just strip outside anyway.

I helplessly threw a dozen towels on the mess and still needed another couple dozen towels to clean the rest up. While I did that I called the Tide helpline for advice. . . how do I get it all cleaned up without staining things orange? How do I keep it from being sticky or slimy without filling the house with bubbles? How many towels can I wash with all the soap in it? After all, I was sopping up 60 loads-worth of soap. In the end, the "professionals" were clueless -- most people don't make such a big mess, and if they did, they certainly would not admit it. Keep in mind, this isn't a big-mouthed bottle. The kids had to push a button to slowly drain it, or they had to remove the lid and slowly pour all of it out. I'm guessing it was all of the above since it was all over the washer, all over the door, all over the cats' crate, all over the wall, all over the floor, and as you know, all over the kids. We got more towels, and more, and more. As I saturated the towels, Allen and Will took them to the driveway, hosed them off, then wrung them out. I took some of the damp towels and cleaned the floor some more, took them back out, they rinsed them. We repeated this for two hours while the triplets played in the backyard. Eventually, it started pouring rain -- real rain with the "renewing rain." Will and Allen used some soapy towels to clean the car, I used some to mop some more of the hallway, kitchen, and laundry room, then I used my Hoover Floor-mate and cleanser to vacuum and mop the soaped and cheesed places. Whew. Almost done.

Wrong. Those rascals were using the flowing downspouts in the backyard to fill up all the vessels they could find -- the Frisbee, the toy teacups, the Tonka truck, the toilet bowl. What were they doing with all the water? I had to know, so I stopped and just watched. Hmmm. Nice. Dumping it on their heads or sipping it. Lovely. Lovely. I was glad I had cleaned the potty chair and disinfected it after lunch. I don't think they used it since, but I couldn't be sure, either, so I only did cheek-kisses at bedtime. Yuck.

I also observed as they painted each other with wet chalk and dipped their heads in the mud puddle. When Ben soaked his head in the mud, he also stopped to show off to Jon and Maddie that he could blow bubbles in it. I think at that point I was in the blank-stare mode. Allen had to poke me to see if I was awake.

Thankfully, Allen was there. Thankfully, he bathed them for the THIRD time in six hours. And thankfully, I snapped pictures of some of the adventure because I'm sure one day I might just laugh at this disastrous day. While I went to pick up dinner (I wasn't about to cook after all that), Allen got a picture of the bathtub AFTER the third bath. Disgusting, but mostly purple chalk-paint with a bit of mud. At dinner, Allen mentioned that there was a bit of "lemonade" to the events. My mind turned and turned trying to figure out what he was talking about. I kept thinking that "lemonade" was a code-word for "urine" and was trying to decipher the hidden meanings to what he couldn't mention in front of the kids at dinnertime. It turned out that he meant that "we took our lemons and made lemonade" but I was such a pessimist by that point of the day. Our "lemonade" was that the car and floors got cleaned. The downsides -- the neighbors thought we were doing our laundry by hand with the hose in the driveway. My throat hurts a little bit more than it did this morning, but I'm not sure if its from the yelling and crying or if I'm getting the kids' cold. We ended up with many, many, many loads of towels that thankfully still had a little soap in them since our bottle of soap that was supposed to last 60 loads is empty. At this rate, though, we may end up with 60 loads of towels, in which case, the ad was right.

I went out for coffee with a friend tonight and was glad to get away. We still had rain showers off and on this evening, but I chuckled when I got out of the car when I got home. It turns out our driveway still has the distinct smell of "renewing rain" and I think it's probably the prettiest smelling driveway in the neighborhood.

In case you are wondering what it takes to clean up 150 ounces of liquid detergent, . . . two adults, one 5-year old, two-and-a-half-hours, 25 large bath and beach towels, 4 loads of laundry each on double rinse-and-spin cycles. Thank you so much, Allen, for coming home, doing all the laundry, and letting me get out for a few hours. I am so blessed to have you as my husband!